Giving is Selfish

Or so says Declan Murphy, an Irish teacher in his mid-thirties who has been living in Kathmandu for over five years.

Declan first came to Nepal for a foreign teaching stint while working on a degree back in Ireland. The last two weeks of that trip were in Kathmandu, where he met and began to talk to all the street kids. As so many Westerners here do, he was awake nights thinking "what can I do to help?" And so he acted, and paid for schooling for three of the kids he had met.

That was just the beginning, and it wasn't long before he moved here and started an organization that works with the street kids of Kathmandu. Some are tossed out and others escape violent homes, but often, the kids choose to leave and find their way on the streets. Aside from the obvious concerns of food and shelter, drugs, child trafficking and child prostitution are significant problems here. But perhaps as great as those, says Declan, are the tourists.

In all the guidebooks, you'll read again and again not to give to beggars. The over-simplified reason is that by giving to beggars, you are breeding a begging culture. But talking with Declan (long after the power was cut for the night and well past the time our waiter would have liked) was enlightening, as he explained how the damage runs much deeper.

Speaking in relative terms, just the fact that a Westerner is in Nepal indicates a level of wealth incomprehensible to most Nepali people. And so we come, and travel and trek and shop, and to ease the guilty conscience, we give pens, or rupees, or biscuits to the adorable kids, or the begging mother with a sleeping child in her lap. Kids are given what they ask for-- whether it is money, food or just time and attention, and so they return to the streets. What 10-year-old kid would choose school over $5, a pack of cookies and loving attention from a foreigner? And after leaving school so early, what hope does he have for a future?

Declan had so many, many, many stories of the kids, the work he is doing, and the life of a child on the streets. And slowwwwly, slowwwly, one kid and family at a time, they are helping.

Once per year, Declan goes home to Ireland for fundraising in the schools. What he is teaching Irish kids, is a good reminder to anyone living a conscious life. You don't have to be famous or rich to make a difference in this world. But you have to do *something*. Unlike many of the struggling non-profits here, Declan's organization is flourishing as they support street kid's transitions into homes, financially support the families and get the kids to go to, and stay in school.

It's a rollercoaster. Declan said that just yesterday was one of those "what am I DOING here?" days. But today, he's making a difference.

Our wonderful evening together left me with a lot of the questions that I offer up in class: Are you living a life that is in line with your beliefs? Are you just taking in this world, or are you giving back? What do you believe in, and are you spending your time, your energy, your money, and your words in ways that support that belief?

Thanks for reading, and coming along on this amazing journey with me.

Peace,

Jill